Overnight at the Hospital Club

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Ever been to the Hospital Club? Maybe, like me, you’ve occasionally wondered what lies behind the doors of this members-only retreat that, from time to time, has been wafted around conversation by creatives and mentioned in columns as a hangout for the odd celeb.

Well, now’s your chance to find out as the Hospital Club has just opened 15 doors on 15 luxury bedrooms in their incredibly central (Endell Street, a five-minute walk from Covent Garden) location.

As a hotel guest, you get to enjoy everything a member does – from the hang-outs, bars and restaurants to the programme of member events, and even their screening facilities. You really are one of the club for a night (or for however long you’re staying).

Admittedly, I’m lucky enough to bed a suite, and the size is impressive. Especially given that it’s in space-is-few-and-far-between zone 1. The room is super spacious and there’s a private balcony, plus my bathroom has both a large walk-in shower and a sizeable cast iron bath. So, I’m not left wanting. I don’t just have room to swing a cat, I could easily take one in each hand and still not touch the sides. I have an open-plan bedroom and living room – equipped with retro antiquities – some of which fondly remind me of my grandmother’s decor. That may sound dated, but the Hospital Club have taken the best bits and neatly woven them in with a fresh and up-to-date feel. There is something very homely and welcoming about this place, including the bed that swallows me up whole.

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And there are nice touches – cocktail mixers ready for me in the side cabinet, rubber ducks by the bath (plus REN skincare on tap), and, when I open my wardrobe, there’s a mini bar of another kind: an erotic menu and ‘the key to pleasure’ for a case that displays black velvet and bejewelled nipple tassels, paddle and blindfold, designed by Holloway Smith Noir. You even have the option to buy the case to take the full set home in. It’s the little details that count.

The club has always had strong ties to the art world, ever since it opened its contemporary doors in 2004. So, it’s fitting that each and every one of these new rooms display the work of an individual artist. My room – room 1 – features pieces from sculptor Julian Wild. His ‘Toads’ and ‘Holes’ are scattered on walls and hide behind curtains. Everything you see can be bought at the right price. It’s amazing to be able to ‘own it’, albeit for only one night.

On a Sunday, the club is somewhat quieter than the rest of the week – the kitchen closes at 7pm and last orders at the bar came at only 8.30pm, but being open on a Sunday is new for the club and I can only imagine it’ll pick up the pace soon enough.

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You really can’t move for art in this place – the hallways are lined with black and white photos of dancers and rock gods, others are lined with moldings that remind me of hieroglyphics for some reason and I’m particularly fond of the fox in the fez that greets me as I step out of the lift and take a right. I’m not sure it’s an artwork, but it’s certainly caught my eye.

Returning back to the room, the turndown service has left yummy macaroons and a card with an inspirational quote from Sigmund Freud: “The only people we can think of as normal are those we don’t yet know very well.” I couldn’t agree more. And I couldn’t think of a quote more befitting of a place that cultivates and celebrates those who stand out from the crowd. And, just as its members stand out, so do these new rooms – because they manage to create the luxury you may expect from a hotel, with the comfort and familiarity that you’d feel at home. Welcome to the club.

Prices for non-members start from £124 per night. For more info and to book a room, visit www.thehospitalclub.com.

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